Author Topic: In support of roughhousing  (Read 5738 times)

Offline Eric

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In support of roughhousing
« on: June 16, 2011, 06:03:01 PM »
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Go ahead. Throw your children around. It’s good for them, say Anthony T. DeBenedet and Lawrence J. Cohen, the authors of “The Art of Roughhousing: Good Old-Fashioned Horseplay and Why Every Kid Needs It.” You can trust them, because they are doctors. Well, DeBenedet is an M.D., while Cohen has a Ph.D. And in the days before Father’s Day they chatted with me by e-mail about exactly how “rough” the horseplay should get.

http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/06/14/in-praise-of-roughhousing/

Offline Warren Dew

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Re: In support of roughhousing
« Reply #1 on: June 16, 2011, 09:35:11 PM »
I have to say, that video has to have some of the most careful roughhousing I've ever seen.  But I guess it is the New York Times.

My wife likes roughhousing with the kids more than I do, though my daughter loves using me as a jungle gym.  I'm much more tolerant of the kids roughhousing with each other than my wife, though; I guess that comes from having been close in age to my brother, where we grew up fighting each other.


Offline el cogollero

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Re: In support of roughhousing
« Reply #2 on: June 16, 2011, 11:13:16 PM »
I wasn't aware that this was an issue...

Offline Jean

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Re: In support of roughhousing
« Reply #3 on: June 17, 2011, 03:12:09 AM »
I think the reason most Mums object to rough-housing is because it often happens when Dad comes home late and gets the kids all wound up right before bedtime. Just when she's been doing the soothing bedtime routine stuff, and she's tired and wants to put her feet up after looking afer them all day. Then Dad buggers off to relax while she's left to calm them down again for bed and they're bouncing off the walls.

Offline sparrow

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Re: In support of roughhousing
« Reply #4 on: June 17, 2011, 04:14:40 AM »
I wasn't aware that this was an issue...

I know a few mothers who will stop their children from doing anything that looks remotely dangerous.  There might be cultural differences.

I've never had any problem with my husband roughhousing with kids that I was babysitting, perhaps because I have many fond memories of my older cousins' boyfriends and husbands doing the same with my siblings and I when we were young.  My dad was more cautious, although he also wrestled with us.

I'm more watchful of roughhousing between siblings that are young and close in age, maybe because those play sessions tend to go from fun to fighting when someone accidentally hurts their playmate.  I liked this quote:

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We also teach things that aren’t so intuitive, such as self-handicapping, reversing the roles, and maintaining good connection and eye contact.


Destor

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Re: In support of roughhousing
« Reply #5 on: June 17, 2011, 12:16:48 PM »
I don't have any kids myself yet but I can safely say that I would be all for roughhousing, between siblings/friends as well.

I think a lot of people nowadays are overly cautious.  Children are pretty physically resilient, their limbs and joints are super flexible, they're just tough little buggers in general.  Imagine what Paleolithic children must have endured, we wouldn't be here if they couldn't take some roughhousing!

My girlfriend and I watched the Babies documentary the other day and some of the things the African mother did with her son probably would have raised red flags for a lot of western parents!